my current Ups and Downs

Up With….

1. Shawn Barber, my favourite painter right now – and for those that aren’t familiar, check this out: …. Warning: Christians probably won’t like it, and it is not his usual subject matter. The point of the Anathema was for artists to work on a darker theme than usual. But just look at the use of light!!!

A tamer piece of Barber's for the more pious of us - from "Tattooed Portraits"

2. The film “Funny Games”…. many people seem to miss what the director is trying to do, so make sure you keep an open mind and don’t be afraid to ask for more!!! NB despite the title, it’s not a comedy.

3. Not taking yourself or concepts too seriously. Learn to laugh at the things people say to try get a bite out of you!!!!

So did I, my friend. So did I.

4. Coffin couches. Honestly, don’t let the fact that there has been a stiff in it freak you out – Try to take it for what it is, a totally beautiful piece of craftsmanship which would look great in the foyay (foyer) of your manor.

"Just pretend I'm a variation of Chesterfield but with handles"

5. Dragonette’s “Black Limousine” …. honestly, listen up:

Runner Up: This black beaded tassel necklace I found for $10 on sale at some generic fashion shop in carousel……..

Permission to look at my tits right now: Granted.

and Down With……………..

1. Taylor Momsen.. I just want to send this spoilt bitch away to Pakistan to sew soccer balls with the other kids her age, and then maybe she would stop whinging about how she was slave laboured into acting/ modelling at 2 years old. Fuck that noise. If my folks had done that with me I would have enough money to buy a house and shit, and I’d be damn grateful for it. Also, if we sent her to Pakistan she wouldn’t be able to trouble our eyes and ears with her contrived routine and carefully placed tampon string (for shock value etc)

"The record is a life record and it confronts issues and goes, here's what f*cking sucks about everything and I don't really know how to fix it but I'm f*cking dying and I'll sing about it. It covers all the bases of life, love, death, sex, religious, politics, murder, hate drugs." - By the way, this quote is not made up.

2. The Atkins Diet..  I was on it for like 3 months in 2007, and the only thing I lost was a whole bunch of self-respect.

I love me a bread-winnin' man.

3. Restaurants/bars in Australia which don’t offer any NZ wines …… they should really go with 1 chardonnay, 2 savs and 2 reds. At least!!!

4. Any product with “i” preceding the title, and those people that place self importance on said product – you people know who you are,  skulking in the corner at parties on your iphone and using it in restaurants. Maybe you could download an app for “manners and social skills”. iHate your face.

A stone in your pocket will also attract more women.

5. The amount of taxpayers money that goes into bad “nouveau art” shit around the train stations, when this country has serious budget shortages in healthcare and education. I’m serious, when did anybody ask for those weird yellow curvy arch things to be chucked on the side of the road? I’m all for spending council money on art, but only if its not a joke.

Here is some more art to add to Perth. Now give me a million dollars.

Runner Up: Not having my pink and purple hi-tops due to Halloween party thievery …….. Ellie if you’re reading this, give them back!!!!!!

Have a nice Monday everyone!!

Love Chelle

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